We’ve worked hard for years to make this an eco-friendly home. Pretty sure we’ve done a great job of it as well. Everyone from the Lovers of Our Mother Nature society said that we shouldn’t live in a home at all. Sure, you get four walls and a roof instead of trying to make a home and raise a family in trees, or sometimes on grassy plains, but we’ve made it work. There are so many ways you can keep a house eco-friendly, not least of all is chucking out absolutely anything that could possibly offend Mother Gaia.
Did you know that you can now custom design your own kitchen? Yep, just go online and plan the kitchen of your dreams, which for us just so happens to be a kitchen without any sort of stove, electric OR gas. I think we may have been the first people ever to request that. Basically, we just needed a lot of worktop space (for all the vegetable cutting), a space in the middle for the kiln, and maybe an extra spot with a chimney so that the smoke from the open flame cooking area can escape. Of course, the true amateurs would leave in things like the plumbing, but no sir. Plumbing comes from industry. Industry is the man. So we got rid of all that and had the taps hooked up to the well in the back garden. Now we have our perfect dream kitchen, and Mother Gaia smiles down upon us from her throne atop the gravel mountain of love, where she reigns with Malcolm.
What I’m saying is that everybody wins. There are no losers when your home is an eco-friendly paradise, and now that we have our perfect modern kitchen design, we shall be blessed among the rest of our brothers and sisters. They shall come and marvel at our properly-functioning home, with all of its walls and ceilings. And a skylight! Always wanted a skylight.