One of the things I hate the most about being a mum is the hyper competitiveness. Every other mum and dad on the block is always looking at your parenting with a critical eye. Whatever you do, they want to do better. Everyone always wants their kid to be smarter, or more athletic, or more popular. But it’s more than just pushing the kids to do their best, sometimes the proxy competitions through the kids turn into all out wars between parents. One of the best examples of this is whenever you need to bake something. As a classic hot-mess mum myself, I have no shame in just picking up some cupcakes from a shop, but oh my goodness some of these mums spend hours slaving away to make ridiculously gourmet treats that are there to impress the parents rather than for the kids to eat. It’s insanity, but there’s such a huge pressure to conform that sometimes it just gets to me.
Like right now, for instance. Jamie is going to a ‘garden themed party’ (seriously, who ever heard of something so ridiculous) where all the little girls are going to dress up as flowers. Naturally, the competition over who’s kid will have the best costume is intense, and I’ve got to say, the pressure is really getting to me. At first I thought I’d just get her calla lillies and call it quits at that, but talking to one of the other mums I realised I had seriously underestimated the amount of effort required. People have just gone all out. It’s kind of scary. The mum I was talking to was debating whether to dress her daughter up as a brindabella or double hippeastrums. That level of detail is just crazy. I mean, they’re kids for crying out loud, they’re not going to know the difference between types of roses!