How to choose a heating system

heating PerthSelecting a heating or cooling system for your house is a large task. You will want to ensure that you will be happy with your choice for years to come, as a heating system is intended to be used for decades. It is crucial to choose a system that will last the distance, be easy to maintain, and fulfil your needs. For a premium choice, consider ducted heating and cooling in Perth.

A new heating solution is invariably an expensive venture, but it adds value to your home and adjusting the temperature can make a large difference to your quality of life. In fact, it can even alter your lifespan. The elderly, small children, and others with health concerns can die due to severe highs and lows in temperature. Even if this does not apply to you, the air temperature can have an effect on your lifestyle. In an extremely cold house, you will be inclined to eat more, which may lead to health issues such as diabetes and heart disease if you eat too many treats. In extreme temperatures, you will also be not so inclined to exercise, compromising your wellbeing.

When selecting a heating system, firstly consider the size and shape of your home. A studio apartment will be well served by a wall unit or even a portable heater. A sprawling three-bedroom family home with open living areas will be most comfortable with a ducted system which pumps warm air into each room. In some areas, it is becoming more popular to install central heating, Perth is one such growth area at the moment. You likely have a neighbour who has already been through the heating installation journey and it is always a good idea to glean their insights if their home is similar to yours.

You will also want to consider how you will use the system. For example if you travel during the summer, you may not need cooling, although it would be wise to get it at the same time in case circumstances change.

My Wayward Pilot Daughter

aluminium ute toolboxes MelbourneOur family line has been ruined. I have given birth to a wayward daughter who refuses to follow traditions. Where did I go wrong? Was it this cruel, callous and yet so inviting world that pulled her away with its promises and twisted pleasures? That’s got to be it, because our family traditions are as solid as they can be and it can’t have been from within the family.

Well, I’m still casting a suspicious eye on her uncle Jamie. Oh, he followed the traditional call to become a nurse, sure enough, but I’ve always gotten the impression that he didn’t enjoy it all that much. And then there was the family Christmas where he stunned the entire dinner table by posing a hypothetical scenario where he became a doctor instead of a nurse. Granny almost had a heart attack right there and then.

What does Alyssa hate so much about being an electrician? We got her Melbourne’s best ute toolbox for her birthday and everything, along with a starter set of tools. That’s about as traditional as it gets in our enclave, with the sixteenth birthday marking the day the females go and become electrical apprentices. I jumped at the call, my mother jumped at the call, and her mother before her did the same, all the way back as long as we could remember. I can see it clearly as day, my sixteenth birthday all those years ago. We didn’t have toolbox central locking back then, nothing quite that fancy, but my toolbox was still a thing of beauty. I looked at it and saw an abundant future filled with electrical work. And yet there’s Alyssa, wasting her money on flying lessons and constantly dropping hints that she wants to break the mold. Granny would toss and turn in her grave!

I’m having a serious chat to Jamie, just to get to the bottom of this. Maybe he’s been filling her head with ideas. I mean…it’s such a nice toolbox. Such a full and useful set of aluminium accessories. And she’ll be inheriting my ute, with custom under tray draws and everything. I just don’t understand who’d pass that up!


Reality TV Makes Home Dreams Come True

buyers advocatesI am the winner! That’s what I love about reality television. Everyone gets a fair shake of the sauce bottle to show everyone else what they’re worth, no matter what their station in life. I was living in a two-bedroom shack in Footscray, and now I’ve been in touch with some of Melbourne’s best buyers advocates so that I can hunt around the the home of my dreams. One day of filming turned my entire life around, and I’m still coming to grips with it!

Of course, things started terribly. There was quiz round, everyone else seemed to know so much more than me and I thought that was it. I had no time to study because the kids needed to be put to bed before I went out to my night shift, and then the lack of sleep wasn’t helping matters. I was so nervous I couldn’t even have slept anyway. But then some idiot messed up his final question about interest rates, and I was through to the second round! Now, decor is in my blood. It comes to me naturally, even though I’ve never had much to work with in the past. I make my shack look nice, you can definitely count on that!

So there was another idiot who recommended the wrong curtains and she was out of the competition pretty much instantly. Lilac, seriously! What a complete dunce. I scored full points, and then we were through to the final round. Basically we had to take the place of a buyers advocate and find a million-dollar property for a family. Despite how out of my depth I was, I gave it a go…and managed to snag a beachfront property ahead of the competition that the judges thought was simply the best find they’d ever seen.

And now look at me. Chumming it up with a quality Melbourne property advocate, finding my own beachfront property. So happy!


Tree Removal is Truly Wonderful

Melbourne tree loppingI’ve always really, really hated trees, so the thought of them being removed makes me feel good inside. Like…okay, it’s like when you see a contestant on a show you really hate get voted/kicked off, and it’s just the best feeling because you know you won’t have to see them any more. I’ve made extra sure there’s not a single tree anywhere on my property, and that’s the way it’s staying because no WAY am I letting any of them grow. I have every Melbourne arborist number taped to the inside of my kitchen cupboard, just in case the opportunity comes to knock down a tree and I happen to be the one to make the call.

Actually, I did seriously consider becoming an arborist when I was younger and my seething hatred for trees was less refined. It all began back in the summer of ‘92, when I was very much younger. One day I saw a tree, just sitting there minding its own business, and I thought…gosh, that makes me so angry. Here we all are stumbling through life, and that tree is just sitting there, growing. That’s all it ever has to do. That tree, and every tree in the world, will never understand our struggles, or even make the effort to give it a go. It’ll never have a bad breakup, have to pay a bill, be forced to babysit for a terrible child, get fired from a job, have to get up early for work after a night of partying, contract a terminal disease, be press-ganged into watching a really awful romantic comedy or undergo the torment of a family reunion where you end up seated between drunk uncle Dan and criminally insane grandma Edith.

They just sit there, and there are millions of people around the world going on and on and ON about how we need to protect them. Oh, the poor trees!

I say no. They can all burn for all I care, because I lived through that family reunion and the fact that no tree ever has to do anything similar just fills me with rage. So I’m happy that Melbourne tree lopping is a real thing. THEY might not do it for those reasons…but I can still look upon their work, and smile.


Good deed start with air conditioning

air conditioning service SydneyI have started a new habit. Every day, I aim to do one good deed for someone else. Not only will others benefit from my newfound source of selflessness, but it will also enrich my own life.

I begin this new regime yesterday. My first good deed was for my sister-in-law. There is still some friction between Marie and I. You would think it would be difficult to do a favour for Marie from across the state border, but I had just the thing in mind. It was easy to remotely organise for an air conditioning service in Sydney.

We had previously had a fight about her air conditioning. I wanted her to get it fixed so I would not be uncomfortable on my visit, and she would not budge. She did end up getting it fixed, begrudgingly. I realise now that her opposition was likely to be motivated by her hip pocket. Sydney is notoriously expensive, and money is always tight for Marie.

Fortunately due to Pat’s salary, we do not have that problem. So I thought I would make amends by paying for her to get her air conditioning serviced. We have enough money that many of my good deeds will involve charitable acts, I think. I know maintenance is crucial for air conditioning in Sydney, the reason on that the air conditioner was on the blink in the first place is likely to be related to her failure to get it regularly serviced.

My efforts at extending the olive branch to Marie have once again been misinterpreted. She was on the phone to me this morning after an air conditioner maintenance technician knocked on her door. She locked him out and yelled at me to mind my own business. I explained that her air conditioning is my business now that I have turned over a new leaf. She did not let the maintenance person in, but I called and made another appointment for tomorrow. I think she will come around once she realises the power of positive deeds.

On the Work Platforms, High in the Sky

bailey laddersToday my therapist asked me to write down my three biggest questions that I feel I need answered before I die. So I came up with a list I’m pretty satisfied with:

  1. Why don’t more animals wear hats?
  2. How do sandwiches become more delicious when they’re cut in half?
  3. Why don’t humans have wings?

That last one has always been a bone of contention for me; in fact it often keeps me up at night. Flying is one of the greatest activities there is, as evidenced by my multiple dreams in which I’m a beautiful fruitbat and I’m soaring through the trees of Madagascar in pursuit of the Nacho King. I ALWAYS update my therapist when I get that one. It’s a majestic feeling like no other.

But really, I won’t accept evolution as anything more than a theory if someone can’t explain why we haven’t grown wings. There’s so much SPACE up there, you know? It’s why I got a job in construction, to be all around those big, lovely, tall bailey ladders and piles of strong scaffolding. It’s not flight, but it gets you right up there with the birds and to me that’s basically the same thing. That was my job for a whole…two weeks or so. I was kicked off the job after I tried to build a set of wings to jump off the top of the scaffolding and say hello to the sun. Something about breaking all the health and safety rules at once. Well, yeah…probably…but you see, I really thought those wings were going to work. It wasn’t like I tried it out on a day that wasn’t windy. I’m not an IDIOT.

So there you have it. I still maintain that aluminium work platforms are the closest we’ll ever get to the sky where we belong. That’s why I had a set of trestles set up in my back garden, which I kept jumping off into the neighbour’s garden, who called the police who eventually set me up with this nice therapist. Don’t know what a therapist is, but I imagine it’s like flight school for your mind.


I Just Can’t Succeed at Failing

outboard motor servicingSo here I am, in the lowest rank of Over-Botch. Interesting place to be, since it’s the only game in existence that rewards you for failing and getting yourself killed (hence the title), but that requires a great deal of skill and it’s skill I don’t have.

I’m stuck in the Grandmaster level, a badge of shame that states I’m way too good and don’t fail enough. Maybe I’m just too naturally successful for this game? I succeed at everything I try, so perhaps this experiment in failure is too abhorrent for my skills. Clearly.

One mission has you defending the harbours of Melbourne, where outboard motor servicing is taking place that could decide the fate of a great future war. Over-Botch certainly has a rich setting, although they need a few more lore bites before I’m willing to accept that outboard motor servicing is what’s going to swing a world robot war in humanity’s favour. Whatever…anyway, these good mechanics are under attack by robots, who want to kidnap them and use them to build anchor winches and outboard motors for the robot cause instead.

Obviously, obviously, the aim of the mission is to fail. But you have to fail splendidly, you see. You have to do it in such a way that people think you’re trying to succeed. That’s how you get the gold medal in failing, and I’ve never managed to procure the coveted gold medal because I just keep guiding my team to victory. Which is to say, I’m guiding them to defeat, which is also victory…but that’s bad.

Why am I so obsessed with this game?? Is it because failing is the one thing at which I cannot succeed? What a conundrum!  Maybe I’ll just have to accept that I’ll always fail at failing. My apologies to the Melbourne boat trailer repairs people of the year 2080. I’m trying to screw up my mission, but I simply cannot.


That Office Just Needed Motivation…

professional conference speakerDan is the worst. Not that I expected anything better from him, because even before he was handed the position of boss (without doing anything to merit that) he was a bit of a layabout. He’s a fun guy, and really good at heart, but SO bad at his job. And I’ve never even seen him at his job; I just inherently know, because he’s Dan and he couldn’t unscrew a jar of peanut butter without moaning for a few minutes and asking someone else to do it for him. Some people are just like that: no initiative, unless you give them a shove hard enough to send them through a wall.

Here, I feel like I made the right call. This situation called for nothing less than a professional conference speaker to visit their office and…do their thing to talk some sense into everyone. And I’m serious, that place was dead. I’ve picked Dan up from the place a couple of times, and I guess everyone is friendly enough, but no one seems to be DOING anything. It’s a listless place. Pretty sure Dan’s PA was reading a romantic novel about hormonal horses, and she wasn’t even being subtle about it. She had a page up on her computer that I’m pretty sure was fan-fiction, right there in plain sight.

Compared to where I work, the place was practically a cemetery, and here’s Dan complaining over coffee about how no one ever gets motivated. Yeah, I could smell the break room from the door last time I visited, so I guess the cleaner has the same ethic as everyone else. So I put my foot down, found a motivational speaker right there and then and now I’m just hoping it does some good. Usually I wouldn’t, but this was dire, and hopefully there’s a Melbourne keynote speaker somewhere who can do some good. Seriously, they need it; things can’t exactly get worse.


Berwick, Not So Peaceful

Berwick pest controlMove to Berwick, they said. It’s peaceful without the hustle and bustle of the city, they said.

That may have been true five years ago, but things have really exploded in the last few years. I liked it, at first. It’s on the edge of civilisation, but close enough that you can drive into Melbourne for a pleasant day of writing and drinking coffee. And now…now…I can’t even find a seat at my favourite café any more. That’s rather important to me, since that’s where I do my of my fiction writing and I need a good atmosphere. Pleasantly-full is perfect. Heaving? It’s just too much stimulation.

All I want is to finish my novel, which incidentally is about a man who learns to communicate with invertebrates. I’ve used the setting of Berwick as inspiration, so now he’s gone from being a generic pest control agent to a Berwick pest control agent. I hear there is actually an active industry in the area, so I must take care not to represent them in a negative light.

Not that there’s going to be much of a problem there…Benton is the main character, after all.Personally, I think this presents a very interesting moral quandary. What must a person do when put in such a situation? He’s a pest control person, but now he can understand the language of insects. He can hear when they’re making plans; he can ascertain their hopes and dreams; he can sense when there’s unease at the thought of being removed from their home.

Hopefully, this causes feelings of uncertainty in the reader as well. What would you do in such a situation? Is there anything to do? Maybe I need to conduct interviews…yes, find myself some people in Berwick, maybe Dromana, who do pest control. Really get a feel for how they do their thing. Wonderfull…


The Esteemed History of Plumbing

Melbourne plumberTaking a night history class was seriously the greatest decision of my life. I’ve been learning practically everything that I feel like I should’ve been taught in class, such as how the crusades were caused by some guy spilling his friend’s drink at a party and how Australia was actually settled by the Icelandic peoples, before they ditched the place.  Too many spiders, and people from Iceland are famously afraid of spiders.  Only ten dollars a class! It’s a true bargain, and we always have great fun.

This week we learned about plumbing, Melbourne’s history and how the city was founded after a local tribesman became tired of there not being adequate piping in the area. That’s why he sold his land to the settlers; they brought plumbing technology that the natives had never seen before, and everyone lived happily ever after with their proper water distribution services and flushing toilets. And the legacy of those first Melbourne plumbers has continued unto this day.

I had questions, of course. I always have questions; it’s my natural curiosity that led me to take this class in the first place. Like, how did the natives know that they needed quality emergency plumbing if they’d never experienced it before? Apparently their leader was a visionary, by which I mean that he had visions. He saw a day when his people would no longer have to make trips to the well for drinking water, or boil water over a campfire when they wanted to wash dishes. No, there would come a day when Melbourne would be a great city, with networks of pipes and sewers in every suburb, and the only thing people would have to worry about was the occasional blockage and maybe the boiler breaking down. And even then, the blockages would mostly be their fault.

And that’s the truth, folks. Nowadays around Melbourne, emergency 24 hour plumbers can attend to you at all times of day. How fascinating to look back on where we came from!